This is gross.

Fear Factor has nothing on motherhood.

Ruby, Alli and I were eating dinner tonight when Alli announced that she needed to go to the bathroom right away. And she wanted my assistance. She and I ran to the bathroom where she had a nasty case of diarrhea. Most of it made it into the toilet. Poor Alli.

After a quick clean-up and wardrobe change, Alli and I went back to the dinner table. Moments later, Alli began to heave up the contents of her stomach. She seemed like a never-ending spout. Alli was covered. So was the table, chair and floor.

What would you do? Alli is sick and covered in nastiness. Ruby is climbing up on the table. Vomit is running across the table and dripping down to the floor. Think fast. Act faster.

It was like a disgusting juggling act. I got Ruby off of the table. Covered the floor mess with paper towels. Called Andy. Stripped Alli down. Got Ruby off the table again. Wiped off table with paper towels. Wiped off Alli. Moved Ruby away from mess. Gagged. Disinfected table...

I finally got the kitchen to a point where I could walk out with the girls and put them in the tub. The bath was uneventful.

I put jammies on the girls and doubled up the sheets and mattress pads on Alli's bed [if you layer (from top to bottom) sheet, waterproof mattress pad, sheet, waterproof mattress pad on the bed, the 2am barf clean-up only takes a minute, just peel off the top two layers and put her back to bed]. Alli fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Ruby and I went back downstairs to scrub the kitchen down. I mopped and wiped and scrubbed until the kitchen was sparkling... and germ-free. I wasn't especially hungry for the rest of my dinner. Seeing the food all chewed up takes so much of the mystery out of it, I really wasn't interested.

Andy came home just in time for round two of the vomit adventure. This time Alli was working the toilet and the bucket at the same time. No fun.

The barf and poop is gross, but the worst part is that Alli just isn't herself. I hate to see her miserable. Keep Alli in your prayers for a quick recovery. And I'm praying that the rest of the family dodges the bullet on this one.